Photo credit: Apostolis L
I went for my scan and it wasn’t what I expected. My doctor did the scan for me and he didn’t find any big changes from the last scan. This means that the follicles had not grown. The whole purpose of this medication is to get me ovulating. I am not currently doing that and it has been driving me crazy.
While I was waiting to be seen, all I kept on hearing is two pregnant women talking about ovulation this, and how their system of getting pregnant they should sell that secret. BLAHHH BLAHHH BLAHHH. I say that because I am being polite. In my head I was swearing at them to shut up already.
For obvious reasons my reaction was totally irrational and I have this women’s intuition if you want to call it that – and my gut was telling me that I wasn’t going to have good news in there.
Needless to say I was devastated and now my doctor has put me on two Clomid tables a day for 5 days and yet another scan on Monday morning. My husband has been getting stressed out about this whole process. My side effects have been affecting him too. The emotions and the mood swings have been a tad much.
I can tell you that I started the new dose on Wednesday and it is Friday now and my stomach has blown right up. You should see it. I have been eating things and not being able to finish because I am that bloated it has been making sick to eat too much.
I don’t know how much more of this I can handle and it things don’t look my way soon I think that we will stop this treatment all together and just try to accept that this won’t happen for us and get on with our lives. I do however have just that little bit of hope that God won’t let me down. Yes, I have been praying every night that my body can do this.
I have also been thinking that my work out regime has been kind of saving my life right now. The stress you feel and all that pressure has to be released somewhere and I have released it at the Gym and not on my husband. So it has really been a blessing in disguise.
More next week.