Photo credit: mireillelovelyworld
It has come to my attention from reading a post by Angie all the way that weight loss in itself isn’t the major change. People you haven’t seen for a long time either tell you that “it’s nice to meet you” because they don’t recognize you. Then when they realise that it’s you, they tell you that you have changed for the better, but they are solely basing that on your weight loss.
There is so much more that happens to a person, yes you lose the weight and look different, but I know from personal experience that once you have been overweight, and then lose a lot of weight your mind is still partially feeling the feelings of obesity. What I mean by that is that once you are obese, even if you lose all your weight, feel more confident and appear to have changed to everyone around you, you don’t really change – you feel better and are more happy yes, you have achieved a huge thing in your life so why wouldn’t you.
However, in my case when I lost 22 kg at one point in my life, the same thing that happened to Angie happened to me, people I hadn’t seen since I started the weight loss walked right by me and didn’t even recognize me, in fact after finding out that they knew me they had a different tune about them. It was like I was more acceptable now, then what I was when I was bigger.
This is not an article that is supposed to be negative, however in light of the facts this is just the truth. When you lose weight everyone loves you and finds you acceptable. The only good thing for me at the moment is that my husband met me when I was obese and loves me for who I am and also finds me attractive the way I am. Others out there in the world don’t often accept me for what I am and therefore my husband and I find that we don’t get invited to occasions because we are both overweight. This is our theory anyway.
There is so many issues I think that don’t get explored, and I found that people don’t really care why you are obese – just the fact that you are you are at the end of the gene pool so you are not worth anything. If anything it is like you are doing something wrong to them personally, the disapproval you will receive is just ridiculous. I know I have written about this sort of thing before, but and there is a BUT, I believe that a person doesn’t really change. I also believe that when you are obese you think and feel a certain way, and it really is a disease, usually mental, however on occasion it will be a medical reason.
All in all I think people shouldn’t patronize you if you have lost weight or even if you haven’t, because you are still the same person, just more confident and perhaps happier. By you losing weight this is a major discipline that would have taken you a long time to perfect, this is the real thing you should be praising, not the actual weight loss.